16 May 2011

The End is the Beginning

So, what's everyone doing this Thursday?

I'm not doing much...just GRADUATING FROM NURSING SCHOOL!!

Not that I'm excited or anything.

This past year has been crazy. It's felt like a lifetime, but at the same time it's gone by so very fast. I know for a fact I've had more breakdowns and crying sessions this past year alone than in my entire 30 years of life combined.

Pathophysiology, I blame YOU for that.

So what's the next chapter in my life going to look like?

I start work at PCRMC Monday, May 23. I will be an oncology nurse. I am beyond proud of this.

I will also get to re-establish living in the same house as my husband.

To anyone who isn't familiar with our situation, it's fun to see the look on their face when I say that. No, we haven't separated. No, we haven't split up. No, he didn't see me have one of my famous Pathophysiology Meltdowns and decide I was too high maintenance (though he does tell me I'm high maintenance. But it's all in love. I hope.).

Living in STL for a year while going to school was difficult, but also sort of good for our marriage. Don't get me wrong - I wouldn't want to do this again any time soon. It's not ideal. I missed my heater-man against my cold feet at night. I missed being able to see him face-to-face when he walked in from work. I missed cooking him dinner and just hanging out on a Friday night. However, our communication skills were put to the test, and we actually had to talk to each other. None of this, "How was your day?" "Fine. How was yours?" "Fine." Then ESPN for the rest of the night. We had to have actual conversations. My night was always made complete with his "Goodnight, sweet dreams, I love you" sign-off. It was good. We learned how to talk (and text) to each other all over again, and I liked that.

M has been above-and-beyond supportive throughout this entire undertaking, and I seriously couldn't have done it without his encouragement and 100% belief that I could actually become a nurse. He kept me going when I wanted to (and did) fall apart. He told me I could do it when I didn't think I was able. Things would happen in our life - family things, work things, random things that just happened to fall upon us because it's us - and he would tell me that it wasn't my job to worry about it, it was my job to focus on school. Looking back, I can see so many things he sheltered me from just because he didn't want to distract me from school. What other guy would do that? He's amazing. And he's mine. I'm blessed beyond anything I deserve.

But he still won't let me practice starting an IV on him, even though he has the perfect veins for it. How's a girl supposed to learn?

Now, it's back to a routine. A job. A paycheck. Baseball games. Dinner. Feeding the dogs. Walking the dogs. Keeping the dogs from eating the couch. And I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to getting back to a normal life. Seriously. I missed my house and family. And I'm tired of taking tests.

I do however have one more major test to go - NCLEX sometime in late June or early July. This might validate a couple more (or a hundred or a thousand) meltdowns - just warning you.

Then, I'll officially be AW: BA, BSN, RN, MBA.

I love letters at the end of my name.