Frantic

After last week's unmotivational-only-went-to-crossfit-twice *shame* week, I feel like I more than made up for it this week.

My usual week, when I'm firing on all cylinders, looks like this:

Monday - Crossfit
Tuesday - Crossfit
Wednesday - Rest
Thursday - Crossfit
Friday - Crossfit
Saturday - Run, walk dogs with friends, swim, beach, kayak...basically do something outside that's fun and active. No schedule.
Sunday - Rest

Today is still wide open...we really want to take the kayaks out to the intercoastal, but sweet mother of puppies, it's just miserably hot outside lately. I'm thinking 50000000 squats with a medicine ball in my air-conditioned living room while HGTV is on sounds so much better.

Plus, construction has officially started up again in our subdivision, and the first thing they're working on is rehabbing the clubhouse and pool. So...no pool this weekend.

Sad. You can't not have a pool in Florida in August! It's a necessity, people.

The weather guy actually used the phrase "so humid it will be hard to breathe" this morning.

Awesome.

Just one more reason for CF at insane hours of the morning - it's not blazing hot yet, and when we have to run, I can hide my jiggly bits in the darkness of the pre-dawn.

Yesterday was slightly ridiculous...I had pre-planned to go into work late because of a doctor's appointment, so I was going to try to sleep in and go to CF around 7am instead of 5. So what happens? I wake up at 4:03, wide-eyed and ready to go. I hadn't even had coffee yet, and I was bouncing out of bed. I decided to just go ahead and go to CF at 5...those are my people anyway.

Thursday was kettlebell day.

Despite the fact that I look dead, it was awesome. We started the workout with a 1500 meter row, which meant that after setting my arms on fire with the kettlebell, it was difficult to reach up and wash my hair thirty minutes later.

But still. Awesome.

Adding in some running on my off days has brought back the ever-popular shin splints. It's not as bad as when I was marathon training, but it's just enough of an annoyance that I can feel it when I walk up and down stairs. I found some shin/calf compression sleeves I want to try...and they come in purple. Bonus.

You know that doctor's appointment I mentioned I had yesterday? It was for these headaches I've been having for 3+ weeks now. My arms and legs have been tingling at odd times throughout the day too, so I decided to get it checked out.

Result - tension from stress. Really? Me? Stressed? You've got to be kidding.

Sarcasm is in full force here, by the way.

Good news:

• Crossfit has brought my BP down. It's never been bad, usually 120ish/70. Yesterday I was 110/60. Nice.
• I'm down 10 lbs since my last appointment.
• When I told my doctor my paleo/primal eating plan, he loved it. I thought he might freak when I told him no grains and very, very minimal dairy, but he said that was perfect. He told me he's a huge advocate of shopping the perimeter of the store - stay away from the processed junk in the middle. All that stuff labeled "low fat" or "low calorie" just has chemicals for fillers anyway.  So yay!

Bad news:

• Despite all the workouts and good eating, I'm still stressed - emotionally and physically. I'm not allowing my muscles to fully relax, and I'm staying tensed up throughout the day. Since my muscles aren't getting the chance to chill out, they're firing off triggers which is causing the tingling and headaches.

Also bad news: no real treatment, except learning how to relax and take time for me.

I don't know how to describe it, other than this frantic feeling I have all the time. I need to do this, that, this, that, this...Doc told me to chill on my color-coded calendars and my lists that have lists (that have lists). My day/week/month is planned down to the hour...my days broken down in boxes that just have to be done.

I feel like I have to rush all the time. I have to get through this to get to that. I have a hard time slowing down to just enjoy the moment I'm in.

OCD/perfectionist much?

My mom mentioned the word "neurotic."

That's me!

I'm going to try to relax today and not make any plans. But uuuggghhhh, how's this? I already have plans to look for new paleo recipes, go through my paleo cookbooks and make a list of new recipes to try. I want to get a jump-start on our monthly menu and grocery list.

It's the lists again!!

But I love my notebooks - I have so many notebooks and journals and colored pens and sticky tabs that mom said she and my sister are about ready to stage an intervention - and the organization that goes into all of my lists and things to do. I'm so paranoid that if I don't write it down, I'll forget it.

This picture was from last year...the collection has definitely grown.

At this point Matt just turns a blind eye to all my sticky notes and lists on the fridge. Half the time I just take them down and re-write them anyway if I don't like my handwriting or if I have to cross something off.

Ugh. I need help. Short of using a high-powered tranquilizer, what do you all do to relax? Anyone else feel this way? Am I alone here?